Tag: Soul

if i could just become. enough. that it would be enough for him to be good to me…

she’s flowers and fire. - butterflies rising

for so long
i thought if i could just become. enough.
that it would be enough for him to be good to me
until i finally realized that wasn’t what he wanted.

he wanted me to be pretty enough
to be beautiful in his eyes,
but my eyes better not be too bright,
and that dress better not be too short,
and those lips better not be too full of lush and love
or talk of too much life for anyone else to see
something beautiful in me…
or heaven forbid,
for me to see something beautiful in myself.
and those dreams i had to find my voice and to spill
all the wild from my heart out into the world…
if i was chasing those dreams,
then i wouldn’t be small enough or sitting still enough as
the sure thing there waiting while he was chasing his.
the more i tried to be. enough. the more i became too much.

because underneath all the ways he needed me to be small,
“enough” is what he felt like he wasn’t.

– butterflies rising

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love languages (blood + sugar + love + magic)…

sugar + flowers… the sweet. the soft. the vulnerable things that tender the walls and break your heart open

love languages…

blood + fire… the wild. the passionate.
the visceral things that burn in your veins,
that bite at your senses, that give you a pulse

sugar + flowers… the sweet. the soft.
the vulnerable things that tender the walls
and break your heart open

love + soul… the deep. the true. the heart.
the lungs. the breathing. the wings. the free…
the things you ache for… and the ones that ache back

magic + stars… the infinite. the destined.
the things you feel beyond words, beyond bodies,
beyond… before… after… always.

– butterflies rising

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the priceless things… nothing feels as rich, as expensive…

nothing feels as rich, as expensive, as being held by hands laced in respect

nothing feels
as rich, as expensive,
as being held by hands
laced in respect,
strong hands that can be
soft and slow against your skin
like flowers, like curiosity…
and eyes that mean what they say
when they say all those things
that eyes say… like,
it’s safe here. and there’s truth here.
and there’s depth in here.
and full. attention.
that undeniable, can’t not. must have.
ache for you, ache for this…
nothing. but. this. kind of aching in you
reaching for an aching me…

those are the priceless things,
give me your priceless things.

– butterflies rising

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virgo child: lay here… safe in the morning light, soft in the daylight…

lay here... safe in the morning light, soft in the daylight, until sunlight becomes skin light

lay here…
safe in the
morning light,
soft in the daylight,
until sunlight becomes
skin light,
breathe in and
let the flowers wrap
you up in sweet
until the air comes easy
from your chest,
until the sky becomes
something you can touch,
and the earth becomes
somewhere you can stay
and still have wings

– butterflies rising

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i love like flowers and fire… i don’t know any other way – poem…

i love like flowers and fire...

i love like flowers and fire…
i don’t know any other way. soft and vulnerable,
and wild and burning… with my heart broken. wide. open.
and even though he came in like wildfire, he was just. broken.
and hardened. and filled with an ugliness raging inside of him
and he thought that if he raged hard enough against me
that he could rage an ugliness out from inside of me too.
then he could say, “see, it’s you.” that he could be so hard to
love that he could make me feel hard to love too. but i just
softly left the room. a graceful exit. and i wrote all my
feelings down to shed his hardened residue. and to remind
myself of all the ways that there are such beautiful
and tender things in me… always.

instead of becoming rage too, i said to my heart..
exit gracefully. heal and grow.
don’t look back.

– butterflies rising

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