in his sleep…

the way he speaks of me in his sleep

there are
things he holds
close, in the awake,
in the lucid,
things he feels, but he fears
how they might fall out so helpless,
so unarmed, so defenseless…
and god, how those walls
can make me question.

but then he dreams with an open chest,
and he tells me of what he’s sure of,
and that i can let my head rest,
‘cause this isn’t a small love,
and that most times it feels like too much love,
and so sometimes… he’s just afraid.

so my fears… they just fall quiet
with the way he speaks to me
in his sleep.

he may have a
hardened chest in the wake light,
but there are flowers in the moonlight,
and when his fears fall quiet…
there are all these things he feels
when his defenses are down.

– butterflies rising

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trust fall…

a little softness, and a little good love... that's all we have to be.

maybe there are
a few hard edges in you
and they just need a little soft touch,
and there are these tender places
in me that just need to know
this is a good love,
and maybe that thing i feel in the
way you take my hand…
how it’s slow, but certain,
i think it’s how we feel the light come in,
and maybe for just this moment
a little softness, and a little good love…
that’s all we have to be.

– trust fall

– butterflies rising

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just a little…

i can get a little reckless when my heart is restless

and maybe,
sometimes i back up
just a little,
just to breathe…
to steady in me.
and maybe, sometimes,
my fingers will untangle
just a little,
just to feel…
how to be mine, all mine.
and maybe,
i can get a little reckless
when my heart is restless,
but it’s still always yours,
all yours.

– butterflies rising

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a graceful exit…

i love like flowers and fire...

i love like flowers and fire…
i don’t know any other way.
soft and vulnerable,
and wild and burning…
with my heart broken. wide. open.
and even though he came in like wildfire,
he was just. broken.
and hardened. and filled with an
ugliness raging inside of him
and he thought that if he raged
hard enough against me
that he could rage an ugliness out
from inside of me too.
then he could say, “see, it’s you.”
that he could be so hard to love that
he could make me feel hard to love too.
but i just softly left the room.
a graceful exit.
and i wrote all my feelings down to shed
his hardened residue.
and to remind myself of all the ways
that there are such beautiful and tender
things in me… always.

– butterflies rising

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i don’t know any other way…

and maybe it's just too vulnerable a thing... this ache to feel it all so deep

and maybe
it’s just too
vulnerable a thing…
this ache to feel it all so deep,
to break myself so open,
to feel it all so sweet.
and to crave the wildest
ways that it can burn,
to let it make me
such a mess and bring me
to such an edge,
to let all be such an
untamed. passionate thing.
maybe none of this is the
safest way to love…
but i don’t know any other way.

– butterflies rising

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