when it matters…

but did you love her with an ache when you had her?

you say it aches,
how much you miss her…
but did you love her with an ache when you had her?

you had every bit of her full attention,
but where was yours?
she broke her heart open for you
again and again… and you just. kept. closing yours.

and so you lost her. and now you learn…
you learn that holding has to have wanting,
and appreciating, and valuing. you learn that love
isn’t static. it’s kinetic, it’s movement,
it’s growth and curiosity. you learn that there has
to be just as much
there has to be more wanting in the holding
than there is in missing, or in reaching for.

you learn that you have to ache for people when it matters…
you have to love someone when you have them.

– butterflies rising

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breathing in a life…

i've been letting go of heavy things - butterflies rising

i’ve been letting go
of heavy things

and i’ve been healing
a spirit, and tending to a soul, and
listening to a heart. and i’ve started to
exhale. and to breathe in… and to
breathe. in. a life

…and i’ve been letting go of
so, so many heavy things

– butterflies rising

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a growing season…

this is a growing season, of change, of turning, of shedding

this is a growing season,
of change, of turning, of shedding,
of letting things fall away, and fall apart,
and come undone, and be uncovered

and then a space of surrender, and being, just being.

and the reflections here are temporary,
so take them in and honor them,
and be honest with them, and own them…
but then forgive them, and don’t stay in them

let it all go… let yourself bloom

– butterflies rising

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self-sovereignty…

become a more beautiful, whole, confident version of you

don’t look for your peace
in getting back at them, or trying to
make them see your worth and
what they lost in you…

go more into yourself,
become a more beautiful, whole,
confident version of you,
one that doesn’t need anything
from them to feel free

– self-sovereignty

– butterflies rising

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